Ok, I know I have said I am going to work on posting and keeping people up to date on the craziness in our lives in general, and specifically Nicholas' medical journey, because that is what we are calling it.
I think there are times when I am at an utter loss, because I don't know which way to turn, how to feel, or who to talk to. Why you might ask? Well, many reasons, none of them are good ones, but there are plenty; it takes too much time, why am I not a better mother, I shouldn't be struggling with this, Why! Needless to say, I need to take this time to blog and process it all for me and for my family but also give all of you a chance to have an insight to where things are at for us. I have a lot in my mind and on my heart. I am not sure if I am going to just throw it all at you or put it all into different posts.
What I do know right now, is that I have an amazing family, an incredible circle of faithful friends (that celebrate the good and pray us through the bad), and a set of doctors that truly seem to be working for us (though at times I have to "push" a little). Ok have decided I am going to put the last day and a half in different posts, even from this one. If you chose not to read, np, but it is there. It is out to help me feel and process and then maybe just maybe with all the extra added prayers we can figure out what we are dealing with and move forward.
So prepare for a little craziness and I am warning you now, you will probably want a box of tissues because I am not going to hold anything back. I am going to put it all down and lay it all out for you and really for me, because I am realizing I am not processing things. I am pushing them further and further down, why? not sure, but probably because other people have much bigger things to worry about than a crazy mom who is "over-reacting" That being said, I will close out this post and move on to yesterdays visit at the ENT and will follow that with a post all about the craziness of today!
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