A Mama's Heart

I am going to warn you now before you get any further, you are going to cry when reading this post. If you do not wish to do that, then do not read this or come back at a later time when you have the ability to let tears stream down your face.
As you know life with Nicholas has been a journey and will continue to be so. That does not mean that we don't love him just as he is or that we are not eternally blessed that he is a part of our family. We truly are blessed beyond words. But that doesn't mean we don't have difficult days and moments when we feel like we are at our wits end like every parent feels some days. Unfortunately, this has been more the norm lately as he has been crabby and screaming, "no no no no no no no no no," anytime he needs to do something he doesn't want to or we stop/take away something he does. It has become a little exhausting.  Now, I am kind of bearing my soul here, so haters leave because, well you are not welcome here.
He has come a long ways in his 3 little years and continues to grow and learn more every day. We hear TONS of sounds coming out of him,  and of course being that he is a boy, they are not always good. Ha ha sometimes they truly stink! However in the past few weeks we have heard many more "words." He now says "k" when we ask him to do something or get something which is so stinking cute. As previously stated he says "NO." He also says "uh-huh" when asked a question that he agrees with and "uh-uh" when he does not agree. This of course is added to the many other sounds and simple communication he has had and continues to add to on a daily basis. His current favorite c-v, for all you non-"speechy" people (which I once was) that means consonant-vowel, is "ga." He tells complete stories using this sound.  It is adorable, fun and watching his face while he is trelling you such a story is just plain hilarious! He really is becoming such a bright little boy.
Today however,  today marked a milestone that will most definitely NOT be soon forgotten. Now, get your tissues unless you don't care if your makeup smears.  Today my momma's heart can forget all about the struggles and trials and frustrations of the last few weeks,  at least for a while.  Because today,  today my 3 year old  son said "Mama" for the first time.  I still am in shock I think because as I type this I have tears streaming down my face.  We all know what a big deal out is for our babies to say their first words which tend to be "mama" and "Dada" somewhere between a year to a year and a half-ish. Well I have been waiting for that word for over 3 years and today he uttered a simple 4 letter word that has me all choked up.  Who would have thought a simple word could change things so much.  But let me tell you,  coming out of the mouth of my sweet little boy who we were told may never have "conversational skills" is the best present this mama could ever receive. If someone had asked me if I would be this emotional about a simple little word,  I may just have laughed at them. I would also be eating my words, because again I can't hardly see my screen.  My son said,  "Mama!" He did.  I heard it clear as day. I want to scream it from the rooftops.  I want to dance, I want to sing,  but all I  can seem to do it sit here and cry, because I am so overcome with emotion. I can't even tell you why.  I think maybe some where a part of me believed that he would never really speak and so I made myself accept the reality that I would never hear it.  But now I can't stop the tears and the emotions. I am overcome with joy and love and adoration and amazement for a little boy who has already conquered so many hurdles in his short life with many more to come I am sure. However, I am not going to think about that right now. I am going to enjoy this moment, savor all the feelings and be in awe once again of the Amazingness of our God, as I sit here with a tear stained face and still so many indiscribable feelings that make the tears start to flow once again. I have to add that as I proofread this I am again so overcome with tears and awe. What a gift sweet Nicholas is, what a gift.
Thank you for your continued prayers for our son and for our family. Today though, I want you to thank Him. Thank Him for all he has done in your life and in mine, because today, today is a VERY GOOD DAY!